Friday, July 3, 2009

Today is July 4

This day reminds me two events.
1. The effort made by my beloved father to develop courage, honesty and truthfulness in me, when I was a small boy.
2. The courage and intelligence of the people of Israel.
How these two are related together?
When I was a small boy studying in 3rd or 4th standard, one day my beloved father showed me the pictures appeared in newspapers regarding a hijack by terrorists and later how the hostages were rescued by the Israel Defence Force.
I could not read the English newspaper. He explained me in detail, how the operation was meticulously done to rescue the hostages of Air France air craft from the Entebbe Airport, how the helicopter flew so low to escape from the eyes of the RADAR, how the black painted car carrying the soldiers entered at the terminal, How the life of the commando Mr Netanyahu was lost, How they managed to come back within 30 minutes of operation successfully etc.
I still remember, his description about this small country and the people as ‘the most intelligent ’ men of the world.
Today is July 4
I salute the brave men of the Entebbe rescue operation.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

The ‘Lame’ Excuse


This New Year’s resolution was to take morning walk on all days. As usual, the resolution remains just as a resolution and tamper finder is regularly irregular..

The alarm bell rang with piercing sound.
In the morning, when still in bed, tamperfinder think of various reasons to put the morning walk off.
Any pain on head, hand or knee……...no
Then look thro’ window……. any chance of rain or moisture?
What’s the time? Is there any chance of getting delayed today’s schedule…?
Has newspaper come? Is any special news?
Has the movement of the men and traffic lessoned?
Is there any visitors’ expected at home?
If answers to all these questions are acceptable, he may think of going out.
Then think of in which direction he should go for a walk. Today, it was postponed to evening and later to night!
A health conscious friend reminded him of brisk walking.
Hence decided to leave all lame excuses and walked fastly..
In the morning, there are so many interesting things to see in Thiruvananthapuram city. It’s not a city in the morning but just a village…no buses, trucks, whistling noises. …..
The city is quite, and also refreshingly unpopulated empty street, exercisers and dog walkers…..

The darkness spread all over the area, the street lights are on, the road and field cannot be distinguished, thanks to Public works Department…..Few street dogs do not like the activities of tamper finder in roaming their area, as if it were their sense of duty …….

He has been thinking about various things to be done at office in perspective planning.

The road and gutter are existing side by side and only an expert civil engineer is able to say which is road or gutter
Eventually it happened.Tamperfinder find himself landed in a gutter….about 1 meter depth
Now understood that he cannot think and walk at the same time!

The right leg ankle twisted….limping and hobbling…he slowly returned to home, this time without thinking anything…
Put a bandage around the shaken ligament part………and now nursing the leg ……..
Now find another reason for not going for morning walk
A ‘Lame’ Excuse.
Is there any gender advantage in withstanding pain?
Some wild thoughts came to mind while nursing the sprained leg. Of course, woman can withstand more pain because they create more pain to self and others!
Piercing little cute nose, ears……………..Are these not causing them any pain?
Pain is something we feel emotionally also .That’s why tamperfinder considers pain of broken heart is severe than that of labor pain.
Tamperfinder usually has pain in his eyes…..treated few doctors also….finally found the spoon in the tumbler is the reason for that.

After the “accident”, tamperfinder moved out only with a bandage.
People started asking him ‘what happened’?
Now going to office putting bandage inside sox….nursing the shaken ligament, tamperfinder passed 3-4 days.
General election is forthcoming.
People started canvassing for their favorites…
Tamperfinder also went along with them making an impression that he too is active in campaigning.
‘Comrade’, ‘u need not come with this damaged leg’ said one friend.”We’ll call u if required”.
“Thank you” vanished tamperfinder
Nursing the bandage, walking with pain, tamperfinder now saying ‘lame’ excuse to all.
During morning walk today, after covering the Thiruvananthapuram city for a kilometer, Tamperfinder finds his friend in a scooter on ‘morning walk.’
U are quite unexpected here? Said tamperfinder.
“Because” she replied,, ”my physical trainer told me to cover a distance of 2 kms every day. Today I didn’t have enough time so I took my scooter and now covered even 3 kilometers!!! She said in a triumphant mood
Yes, that’s another way to keep fit.

Moral
Pain means different things to different people and different things to same persons at different times and…

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Beauty and Brain

Beauty and Brain
Beauty parades are always source of everlasting laughter and fun.
You just have to listen to the contestant’s answer to a question asked during the contest……….
A recent example: At the Miss Teen USA pageant, Miss South Carolina was asked:
“Recent polls have shown a fifth of Americans can’t locate the US on a world Map. Why do you think this is?
The ‘ intelligent beauty’ answered………..
“I personally believe that US Americans are unable to do so because uh, some people out there in our nation don’t have maps and uh, I believe that our education, like such as in South Africa and the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should, our education over here in the US should help the US, or, or should help South Africa, and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future for our children.”
She won the 12th place coz there were only twelve participants ………
After the contest, she contacted Jon, her fiance………. And told him how cleverly she dealt with all tricky questions… …..and complained him about the prejudice of Jury in asking her irrelevant questions…………
She left the theatre…There is another beauty contest next month…..and determined to face it.

She is driving the vehicle along the valley………….
Birds chirping of to her left accompanied by the sound of water rushing down the hill in the form of a stream. Water headed back to the ocean to evaporate and begin its run down the stream again days from now!
She likes latest musics..Though not sure about the lyrics and its meaning…..she simply listen to the music..Coz listening to music is a fashion and what others think if I don’t …..

No mile posts went by to inform her about the progress of driving. .
She thought about various things…….
There are many other questions they could have asked. Like who invented Electric bulb? Who is the highest paid hero in Hollywood? .What is the name of the pet of Richard Gere or Julia Roberts? At What price can we buy a Jeans and top?. What is the expansion of (A+B)2...so on…..But these fools have got only this question to me…..She felt very bad………

It was international day of Brain &Beauty

The goddess of Brain &Beauty was observing all what is happening at the stage …..

The car came to a sudden halt …..She could see nothing in front..Except the goddess of brain and beauty……emerging from thick fog...
She came out of the car
The goddess smiled at her…and consoled her…
Be brave…my lass…..I’ll give u three wishes…the last one is a special offer for today only….she said
But only one condition……your fiance will get 10 times what u get.
‘Agreed’? The goddess asked
‘Why not’? After all it’s Jon, and we are going to marry soon.
Ok… then…What’s your first wish?
‘Make me the most beautiful woman’….
within no time she became the most beautiful woman…no wonder Jon became the most handsome man….
‘We ‘ll be made for each other’ she said to herself
And your second wish?
‘Credit a billion dollar to my bank account now itself’……..
No problem…The ATM card of JON is with me…………. and I’ll change the pass word today itself. She said to herself…

And what about the last wish? The goddess was in a hurry mood as she wants to participate in 2-3 seminars on the occasion of International day of Beauty and Brain and to inaugurate a protest meeting against asking difficult questions to contestants in beauty shows….and in reality shows..
And the third wish is…..’a mild heart attack’.she said imperturbable.
After granting the wish, goddess disappeared in horizon ….

Moral
It’s not true that beauty and brain can’t go together.
If you have brain you will seem much beautiful than a stupid one who just have good looks…………

Sunday, February 22, 2009

DREAM FACTORY


Dream Factory.
I happened to see an article on Sabriye and Paul the other day in ‘The Hindu’. I had just casually gone thro’ the blurb and appreciated the charitable work done by two goodhearted person.
Today, when I received a call from my friend Ramesh in the morning seeking a help, I certainly not expected that the visitor would be a exceptional person. .
The visitor was none other than Mr.Paul, whose photo along with Sabriye I have seen the other day in news paper. He is running a blind school near my office.
His wife is also blind. They are running an institute for training the trainers of blind people across the world. Both are from Germany, and were at Tibet before selecting God’s own country as their service field.
He is very cheerful and I experienced positive energy on his closeness.
Born to a middle class family in Germany, he traveled all over the world. There are places where the blind children are put to solitude confinement, deprived of the right to live as others as a punishment to the sin committed by them during their previous life, so goes the belief.
During the short discussion, I asked him why he chose God’s own country as their zone of activities, how to mobilize grand etc…...
He has a vision……The vision to help the dejected…. Depressed…….







During the discussion, Paul described the customary superstition s at various part of the world.
Paul gave up his job in Netherlands and now occupied as the full time director of the school along with Sabriye.This is a dream school, to be specific, a dream factory.
Soon he left my office, expressing sincere thanks for the advice I had given for a hitch they face.The energy he transferred was with me for days together.
The International Institute of Social Entrepreneurs (IISE)is a venue for training the trainers. The participants are taught with project planning, raising funds, and negotiation with Government etc.
All are blind
Dream first…dream about reaching the stars… then uncover the reality.
………………………..
When nature wants to do something, she creates genius to do it
Yes, Paul and Sabiye are the creation of God and that’s why they chose ‘God’s own country’ as their area of activity.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Ten Commandments of staff meeting

1. Be on time and in your place at the meeting time.
2. Know who is leading the meeting and show them due respect.
3. Be a good listener. Focus on the speaker and what they are saying.
4. Be supportive, encouraging and enthusiastic when others are giving reports and presenting new ideas.
5. Don’t dominate conversations or interrupt and be sensitive when others want to talk.
6. Don’t be in a mode of attacking, arguing or defending. Take responsibility for your words and actions.
7. Take notes during the meeting.
8. When given an assignment avoid reverse-delegation.
9. When giving assignments confirm that person understands completely.
10. If you need to bring up a problem for discussion that is in your department or project have one or more possible solutions ready to present. (Courtesy internet)


The other side
1. When specific remarks are made, it may annoy others, who cannot adjust the meeting. Hence be as vague as possible.
2. Don’t say anything until the meeting is half over. This may stamp you as being wise. When in doubt, suggest that a committee will look into the matter and submit a repot
3. When discuss about punctuality, Try to deviate the subject as quickly as possible. If discussion is continued, make others feel that u are taking a lot of pain to keep punctuality.
4. Bring a piece of paper with some computer print. Every time the speaker make a point, pretend to check it in one of the print out.
6. Pretend to find substanding evidence in the paper.
7. Nod vigorously till your head is loose.
8. Takedown all what others say. When ask for ideas to be discussed don’t say anything and tell convener that all points are covered.
9. When the convener says something, compliment it as a wonderful idea.
10. Demand for more staff, so that others may feel that u are doing a lot with minimum resources.

Friday, February 6, 2009

People pleaser

“I’ ve no trouble in saying others ‘No’.
Can you do a favour to me?
When you are very busy, would you refuse a call from a friend asking you a favour?
Many people are ready and willing to help others in need. Sometimes, people do away too much for other people at the expense of their own quality of life. While it is a wonderful thing to help others, we all need to keep a delicate balance of giving and keeping for ourselves. When a person just can’t say ‘No’ to someone who asks a favour, they are People Pleaser. Those who worry that saying ‘No’ is always a bad thing, need a bit more balance.
A pretty balanced style is more acceptable when compared to ‘self pleaser’ and ‘people pleaser’. It is nice to help others, but sometimes we have to please ourselves first. You don’t have to please every one but you should also do what makes you happy’”.

The above are not the brainchild of tamperfinder, but came to his mind when one of his colleagues earnestly putting all her time to help a person, clearly knowing that the effort will definitely boomerang her. She certainly needs a balance between the two categories above.
Tamperfinder is no different person. He can say ‘no’ vehemently to all except to those financial consultants cum marketing executives who sells products like Insurance, SIP, ELSS, Mediclaim etc etc.He may sometimes borrow money and join the scheme if the vendors are trying for a job which would be decided by their marketing ability. Needless to say, many schemes are running at heavy loss. In 2-3 cases, tamper finder doesn’t know even the name of the fund he joined!!!! And not courage enough to peruse the NAV of the scheme in the present bear market condition in which the prices of securities are falling.

Aswathy is one among the vendors used to call tamperfinder frequently, whether in busy schedule or not,she don't care.Tamperfinder has been listening to her sweet voice for the last two years. She is working with Blue chip company of financial consultants. Initially tamperfinder avoided her by not saying NO, but by ‘call me later’. She explained the advantage of the products and admitted that she lives out of the commission received.According to her,all the products she deals are the best in the financial market.
Her pestering continued for months together and tamperfinder understood that the delay tactics would't be successful anymore and finally told her to come and explain about the product. (And of course, to see the owner of the sweet voice in person!)
Instead of Aswathi coming,……….. two dark tall men with lap top and handouts of various schemes came and arranged a presenatation about the scheme meticulously to which tamperfinder finally succumbed.
Now two months have passed since tamperfinder heard her voice coz of a shift of place and change of phone number. Definitely, one day she’ll find it out.
Aswathy is not alone………..
There is Ganesh, Anoop, Sajan, Pradeep, Nishanth…
Still tamperfinder has not learned a lesson!!
Because he’s a vendor pleaser.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

A Clean desk is devil’s den


A clean desk is devil’s den. That is why I keep my desk always full of files and untidy (and not because I could not deal the files in time!)
But a clean room is definitely not devil’s den. That’s why I decided to clean my room.
I just don’t know when it was cleaned the last time.
This is an old heritage building carrying the nostalgia of great luminaries who chaired the office, spent time , even before I was born.
Tamperfinder always has the nostalgic feeling and can often easily go back to those days (not physically) This heritage building belongs to a part of the electricity department of an erstwhile royal dynasty.
Yes, the room needs urgent cleaning, tamper finder decided. Coz, the other day he found a cockroach nearby...
During cleaning work tamperfinder found a mouse running away from his room and took shelter nearby! Another One is driven out of room by the cleaners.
Two” mouses”……….no……only … mice………. are taken away….. If mouse become mice, why can’t a house become “hice”?
Why not? He said to himself.
The cleaners are busy with there work. One man is hitting the carpet to drive out the dust. He is beating the carpet gently as if it may hurt the carpet.
Two other are trying with a mop
Top, Pop….the similar words came to his mind
Tamperfinder again thought for a while inhaling all the dust.
If ‘Pop’ is father, ‘Mop’ must be mother.
Yes,Mothers are often seen with mop and not fathers with it.!!!
Mop? What is the origin...
Maintenance Operation Protocol, Muriate Of Potash, Manual Of Practice, Method Of Production, Mother Of Pearl. Manual of Office Procedures etc……………..
But None of these mops s will clean my room however!

As cleaning progressed, a colleague came. There is a sprain on his foot. He is limping.
‘Put a boot of the feet’, I told him
‘It won’t look nice, sir’ he said ‘if I put it on single foot’.
‘So put it on two feet’
.Then again got confused, if foot becomes feet, why can’t a ‘boot’ become ‘beet’?
?
I’ve already joined with the cleaning work, but my friend simply looking the work
Yes, He is a looker.
I saw the security man cooking something in a near by room. If my friend who simply looks at the work is a looker, the other man who cooks must be a ‘cooker’.
A metal pan with a stand is traced from the corner side of the room by a man.
It belongs to yester years with engravings of some sort of art work.
If ‘man’ becomes ‘men’, will the ‘pan’ be a ‘pen’?
No.

The driver came.
‘Shall we move’?
Nodded tamperfinder. ‘Yes, where is the vehicle’?
‘Sir, due to this heavy dust, I parked it out in ‘driveway’.’
‘Good’, ‘we shall now drive in the parkway’, said tamperfinder putting end to his wild thoughts.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

A LOAD SHEDDING TIME WITH MY FAVORITE


It is load shedding time in the city.
No TV or Music, no noise except few vehicles. The vehicles are off the road today due to shortage of fuel.
How to tide over the ½ hour time? Usually I prefer to stay out during this time but today could not.
I was simply sitting in the settee.
Soon I felt her presence.
Yes, she is sitting near to me!
I can see her eyes at candle light
She’s looking at my face only ,………her eyes reflect like a precious stone
Yes, she adores me!
She has no shame in sitting with a grown up man, especially when the lights are off and others are busy with their works.
I was not wearing a shirt since it’s too hot.
She moved close to me …..Little by little expecting support from me..
I looked at her face.
Yes, she loves me.
Her nails are shaped beautifully. The nature has given all necessary ingredients of beauty to her.
The nail polish is brown and shining, very suitable to her dresses (?)
.
Yes, she is colour conscious.
Her eyes are blinking. The eyebrows are not touched but in good shape, may be she is visiting beautician frequently. The curly hair is falling on her face and ears..
She is not bothered to comb it properly.
Yes, she is a careless beauty.
Her lipsticks definitely need a touch up, but she is not cared.
I just don’t know what she wears…its pitch dark and I could see only a red necklace
I touched her shoulders just to discourage her from coming nearer and nearer. What others think of me when sitting with a careless beauty?
She is again coming nearer and nearer, pushing me to the other end of the settee.
Now, I cannot move further.
Yes, she is shameless. I said to myself. There is time and place for any thing and everything. ‘This is load shedding time. Electricity may restore now, please move a little’ I said in a soft voice.
She has no mood to hear me , but placed her soft hand on my body……..pressing the shaped nails …..
‘No this is not a fair time’……I pushed her back, but she is in no mood to listen me…and put both her hands on me…
Yes, she is adamant.
I tried to get up but prevented by both her hands. She pressed her face on me and kissed.. …I could feel the wetness of her lips…
Yes…she could not suppress her love and emotions as she missed me during day time.
She kissed me again …but this time I felt itching rather than any emotion.
I pushed her back. And gave her a small blow on her tail……she jumped down, crossed her fingers to me and went away..
Yes,she is my favorite dashund.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009


Call it a day on a high note.
Stop singing when the voice is good (or stop using mobile before its range is out!!!)
Tamperfinder has been the Public Relations Officer of God’s own utility
and has been (mis)handling the vivacious media in God’s own country for the Last two years. As Gods do mischief, so does his media in his own country and utility. ‘God’s own utility’ is a source of news for media for quite some time. The vibrant media don’t like any voids and want news all the time. If not properly informed, they may get information from some other sources; usually from the unofficial PROs and the interpretations need not be correct.
My utility deals about 10 million customers, a quarter century employees and equally, older employees. The modern concept of the management says each and every employee should act as a PR manager, and at the time of crisis, the CEO himself will act as the PR Manager. In tamper finder’s industry, the unofficial PR Managers will come into picture when they quarrel with their higher ups for denial of leave or promotion of some other categories, or late arrival marked in muster roll etc.As mentioned earlier, few media persons moving in tandem with these so called PR managers causing hard time to the real PRO.
All important policy decisions are to be informed to PR wing as soon as it is arrived. It’s for the management to decide whether it should be made known to the public or not. The PR manager need not be a jack of all trades but should know who the actual person to disseminate the ideas.Tamperfinder gets information of decisions by his own efforts only and there is no official channel which automatically informs him of decisions. When certain informations, not meant for the intimation to public is made available to tamper finder, as if a positive news and later causing embarrassment to the management, something is wrong somewhere.
There was only one government owned news channel in God’s own country few years back and now it has reached to two dozens with 4-5 exclusive news channels! Tamperfinder has two mobile phones and two land line phones but has only two ears!. One of his friends walked out of room as tamperfinder was busy on phone could not attend to him for 10-15 minutes. The PR manager has to liaison with all stake holders. The PR dept has to be informed with all important decisions which may be useful if shared with public rather than sharing news which causes embarrassment to public and stake holders. The difference between these two are very narrow and tamper finder had to apply mind to study why this information is passed / not passed, before putting in the press information system. He had to read the related decisions in this regards and analyze how the stake holders responded in similar situations earlier. (tamper finder can easily (?) read the mind of Management, Media and Masses but very poor in reading between lines!!!!!)
So……….
Stop singing when the voice is still good.
Or
Stop using mobile before the range is out.

The Funny ICICI bank

The Funny ICICI bank
This is the experience I had with ICICI bank today morning.
Tamperfinder was quite happy when the Distance Education University asked him to remit the tuition fee by DD preferably thro’ ICICI bank, not because he likes private new generation banks, but this bank exempt DD commission for tuition fee for my university.
Very good
As I tendered my application for DD for a small amount less than 10000, the chocolate boy at counter asked me whether I possess necessary identification documents with me.
‘Identification for this small amount?’ Whispered tamper finder.
‘Yes sir’,This is our rule and have to follow it scrupulously.

‘Bhayya,…I’m an SB account holder of this bank, still want identification for this just 4 figure amount?’
‘Yes that’s our rule, we have to follow scrupulously’
OK..
Tamperfinder gave the original identity card, a driving license, first scrutinized by Asst manager, then by deputy manager and finally by the Branch Manager himself. Finally he handed it over to the security, who simply disappeared??!!!
5 minuets passed……… no response.

‘Sir……….. we will get u everything within 10 minutes’ one of the ‘boys ‘said….
‘This is our rule’ we have to follow scrupulously’
????
10 minutes passed. One gentle man came to withdraw 500000 rupees.
No cross checking…….. Simply arranged the money.
Another came for depositing a bunch of 500 notes.
No checking, but with a smile they ‘snatched’ the amount and deposited.
Tamperfinder is in double trouble.
He gets neither the DD nor his identity card.
They may get a duplicate of this?
Why cant?
No? These people are not like this, tamperfinder consoled by him.
Again few minutes passed
?
‘Sir, this is our rule we have to follow scrupulously’.
Very good
Again time passed
???
‘Sir the system is slow, the printer is not responding’ that’s why the DD getting delayed.’
‘Yes …the printer may also verify the genuineness and it also has to follow the rule scrupulously,’ the tamper finder said to himself.
Tamperfinder had a long relationship with ICICI bank.
Once his account was freezed by the authorities
Not because any Government orders…
Not because any court orders…..
But one of the staff, by error has done it
Later the Branch manager visited tamperfinder’s house at night with a bunch of orchid and an apology letter.
All these things flashed to his mind
‘Sir, here is your DD,the same gentleman standing in front of me, making abrupt end to my memories.
He soon left the bank.
Ssssssssssssssssiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr………..
One man is running towards him? Why???? tamperfinder also start running as if something caught fire
?

Any security problem?
‘Sir, You have to put two signatures on photo copy of ID card and attest the identification card of which we have scanned a copy to keep with us…………” He completes all in single breathe.
“And that’s our rule and we…………”
…….”Have to follow scrupulously…” this time completed by tamperfinder
The only error tamper finder has done is still operating a SB account with them in spite of all these underprivileged dealings and spent unnecessary time for availing the facility of free DD.
For saving 25 rupees, he gas to spend 25 minutes .Tamper finder is pennywise and pound foolish.
The Funny ICICI bank!!!!!!!!!